Tamera Mowry-Housley is opening up about some negativity she has received — and how she isn’t standing for it.
“I think the criticism is even worse now, with the racial tension that we’re seeing and the political climate,” explains the 38-year-old star, who is biracial. “But my husband, who is so great, said, ‘You know what, Tamera? This is just teaching you to focus on the thousands of people that are for you, as opposed to the very few people who are against you.’ He’s right.”
She adds, “When we first came out publicly as a couple 12 years ago, I remember a few negative comments, such as ‘Never expected her to be with him!’ But I never expected it to reach this degree of criticism as I got older.”
While her husband is a big contributor to the positive way Mowry-Housley handles unwarranted comments, she explains that the way she and her siblings — twin sister Tia Mowry-Hardrict and their brothers Tavior and Tahj Mowry — were brought up plays a huge part as well.
“I wasn’t raised to see color, I was raised to see character,” she says. “When my mom found out that I was dating a white man, she said, ‘Listen, I went through a lot and I want to make sure you love this man, because it’s not easy. You’ll face scrutiny. So make sure that you guys are in this together and make sure you understand what you will face.’ ”
“I said, ‘Mom, what are you talking about? It’s 2005. People aren’t going to care!’ But she was right,” the longtime actress continues. “I look at my parents and I think, ‘Wow, they must be really strong, because what they’ve been through is 100 times worse than what we’ve gone through.’ ”
“As a toddler, [Ariah] has trouble communicating,” says Mowry-Housley. “Now that I’ve been through that phase, I know, ‘Okay, we just have to teach her to use her words. Let her know it’s going to be okay.’ ”
Meanwhile, Aden “is very high energy,” as his mom puts it. “He’s like his dad; he can’t sit still,” she says of her son. “But he just loves to cuddle at bedtime. Ariah is my chill baby — she’s more like me. She can sit there and watch Moana; it’s her favorite movie right now. I couldn’t do that with Aden.”
Mowry-Housley told PEOPLE in 2016 that she was going “back and forth” about whether she and her husband would be adding to their brood, but now says, “I think I’m done” with getting pregnant again.
“I’ll always have this thought of maybe adopting a child for the third one. But my body is done,” she reveals. “I had babies later in life and it’s harder for me. You don’t realize how often you’re picking them up and then your back goes out. You need the energy.”
“Also, because I had them so close in age, I haven’t had the time to catch up with me,” notes the working mama. “I need to pour that time back into me and back into my husband before we even think about adding another child to our family. I do like not being outnumbered by children though.”
This article originally appeared on People.com